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After writing numerous birthday stories for this board, I volunteered to write my own story this year. My life has been crazy (and fun) but anyone who had tried to find me to give me a special birthday celebration would have found me difficult to find. (My "twin" KT with whom I have been celebrating birthdays for fifteen years can't find an agreeable time until Halloween.) So, this is really how I spent my birthday!

ON THE GO

Saturday, October 25, 2008, 8:30 AM

"Are you really certain she is going to be there?" Ares asked his brother Hercules. The two of them had been trying to locate McJude to wish her a happy birthday the entire month of October. Now they had arrived at her new house only to find her gone. "Last year you sent us to the wrong house. That was bad enough, this place is in the middle of nowhere."

"And in the woods,." Hercules countered, "still I have it on the best authority that she is going to be there. At least she R.S.V.P.ed that she was going to be there."

"Reading her e-mail again, bro."

"I have to do something to catch up with her. I can't believe that she is gone so much."

"She was home two weeks ago."

"I told you, Ares. She was sick. In bed all weekend, alone, coughing and sneezing."

"The coughing and sneezing doesn't sound like much fun at all, but I would have be happy about the alone part." Ares leered. "Where was she last weekend?"

"Same place she was the last weekend in September. At her father's. Last week they had an auction sale to sell all his antiques."

"We could have gone. I can always use a new sword."

"He had one in a cane that would have been just your style. Sold a bowler hat, too."

"You were there. I knew you went without me."

"I was there, but I could never get her to stay in one place long enough to wish her a happy birthday. I tried to get her to stay in the house, but she kept going out to see what was . . .

"Damn, Hercules, she would have stayed in the house if I was there. You're losing your touch."

"And you did such a good job that weekend she was in Indianapolis."

"Two hundred thousand people at a parade, a stadium full of football fans, fifty avid Highlander fans and a hung-over Methos. Sorry, Herc, I was just a little distracted. Furthermore her husband was there."

"Her husband is always there, Ares, that's why we have to be cagy. He's going to be there this weekend, too."

"I told you we should have gone that weekend her husband was at Notre Dame, but no, you didn't want to go to Columbus that weekend."

"There was a hurricane."

"Who ever heard of a hurricane in Ohio?"

"There WAS a hurricane. A tree fell on her roof. Power was out for 30 hours and she was one of the lucky ones."

"Still, she was home alone."

The conversation continued. It seemed that since August, McJude had been away, very busy, or sick every weekend. The weekend of her birthday she was scheduled to go to a party in the "deep dark woods" which coupled with the rain forecast did not excite either god or demi-god. Still it was her birthday, and her calendar said she was going to be gone the next weekend too.

"Let's give it a try!" They both said together.

Later that evening.

The woods were dark, but the weather was much better than predicted. The house was up a long driveway with a steep hill at the end which made it easy but physically challenging to sneak in. Hercules found himself surrounded by women who loved his "costume" and Ares spent the entire time talking the musicians about classical music. From time to time, McJude, dressed as a biker chic and her husband dressed as a cowboy would flit by, but the two never seemed to find a time when they could isolate her from the rest of the crowd. After eating their share of Halloween cookies and drinking homemade beer, they finally gave up and went home.

Both were surprised when Iolaus showed up. Perhaps it was because Iolaus rarely had a night that he was not "out with the ladies" or perhaps it was just because he was dressed as Little Red Riding Hood. The cape was muddy. his blond wig was askew on his head, and he seemed to be missing one of his Mary Jane shoes.

"I've got to get these clothes off," Iolaus said shedding pieces immediately upon walking in the door. Herc and Ares exchanged glances wondering who was going to have to clean the mud-stained carpet. The clothes were easy; they could go straight to the trash.

"Where have you been?" Hercules asked with a stern voice.

"Obviously, to the woods. I went to wish McJude a happy birthday, and obviously I was a bit more successful than you are. Good thing her husband never watched those Widow Twanky episodes. We just wandered off . . . .

Hercules muttered to himself, next year he would have to try to find Dylan Hunt's little Dutch Girl costume.